My feet touch the floor.
The first thing that I am aware of is the architecture. I’m in a large mansion that feels like a mall because it has that commercial, well-frequented feel. There are a lot of balconies and rooms. And a garage. From the outside the house seems to be a garage attached to a lot of balconies.
It’s a party, and everyone is there. Everyone.
It’s very public, every action is observed.
A friend waves at me from the balcony, I wave back and then go into the garage. Two of my other friends pull up in a work truck, they’re a couple, and they’re there for the party, but they look like blue collar workers. We talk for a while, and then lose each other in the crowd.
Everyone is laughing, enjoying themselves.
Then you walk in, through the front door. A lot of people turn to greet you, you’re well known. I watch you as you enter, smiling and confident, as you always were. You smile in my direction and I feel hope surge through me. It’s stupid; I shouldn’t make myself so vulnerable to your actions.
Time passes, the party goes on. It will never stop.
I talk, I laugh, and I dance. I’m great, confident, everything I have always been and will ever be.
Eventually I find myself next to you. I say hi, or something equally common and inane.
In your expression I see a door closing. Locking me out. The same door that I tried to shut a long time ago. It’s stupid; I shouldn’t make myself so vulnerable to your actions.
No one notices; the party goes on.
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